In bitterness of soul, Hanna wept much and prayed to the LORD. And she made a vow, saying, "O LORD Almighty, if you will only look upon your servant’s misery and remember me, and not forget your servant but give her a son, then I will give him to the LORD for all the days of his life, and no razor will every be used on his head." (1 Sam. 1:10–11 NIV)

Thinking the Unthinkable

How does one consider even the possibility of voluntarily giving up a child at an early age, much less packing his bag and dropping him off at the temple when he’s barely three? Letting go was hard enough for us when our kids were fully grown; it’s impossible to think about doing this with a toddler. Yet, Hannah made precisely this vow concerning her only child, Samuel, and then, without wavering, fulfilled her commitment to God when the time came: "after he was weaned, she took the boy with her…and brought him to the house of the Lord at Shiloh" (1 Sam. 1:24). Equally remarkable was Elkanah’s response. This faithful husband honored his wife’s pledge, even though it was made without his knowledge or input.

Letting Go Is Easy, Right?

Letting go, of course, is the right thing to do at the age-appropriate time. We were going to be good at it, too, we told ourselves. So exemplary would we be, we imagined, that we would write a book—the definitive guide to launching teens into adulthood—as a way of assisting other parents through these difficult waters. That was before our two reached the age of transition. Only recently have we had to face the painful truth with our eldest that, despite her college degree, good job, great relationships, and pending contract to purchase a home of her own, we were still attempting, despite our protests to the contrary, to hang on and, in her words, "control" her life. Since that encounter, we’ve repented of our failure to let go. It’s actually easy to repent of this sin. We should know; we’ve done it a thousand times!

Ordinary People, Extraordinary Faith

Hannah and Elkanah were a mostly ordinary couple whose faith in God enabled them to do the extraordinary. You get the impression that this wasn’t the first time they decided to cast their cares upon the Lord and seek his blessing in their lives. It appears that Hannah and Elkanah and YHWH were on pretty good speaking terms. Years later, it is, in all likelihood, his own parents’ example that Samuel had in mind when he exhorted Israel to "Be sure to fear the LORD and serve him faithfully with all your heart; consider what great things he has done for you" (1 Sam. 12:24). It is evident, even from the short account of their lives in Scripture, that Hanna and Elkanah loved God and were dedicated to doing his will above their own.

It Begins with Surrender

The religious terms for what Hannah and Elkanah did are submission and surrender. The first thing they surrendered was the notion that they could do anything at all to change their situation. Hannah’s womb remained barren, after years of longing for a child and trying to conceive. All they could do was pray.

The second thing they surrendered was the fear of failure and disappointment. Fear keeps us cautious, makes us hedge our bets, allows us to lower our expectations, demands that we focus only on what seems immanently possible, what’s been done and experienced by others before us. Hope is surrendering the limitations of how it has always been done. It is an opening of the mind and heart to the splendid possibility that God might just do a new thing, never before seen, and he might just do it for me.

The final thing Hannah and Elkanah surrendered was the idea of ownership. In dedicating a child entirely to God, should the Lord choose to grant their fondest dream, this trusting couple recognized that "every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights" (James 1:17). Even if they had wanted to, and you know they desperately wanted to, out of the depths of God’s wisdom, they realized they could never fully own or control another human life. Such things belonged to God already. Theirs was merely an act of astonishing honesty, of acknowledging the reality of the situation. They gave back to God what he had so graciously given to them in the first place.

Others Did Not Understand

In taking the position they did, in solidarity with one another, Hanna and Elkanah were no doubt subject to misunderstanding and gossip. "What are they thinking? It’s not right?" After all, it’s not the normal or responsible thing to do—take your three year-old to kindergarten Sabbath School, dressed in his Sabbbath best, and just leave him there, hoping that the pastor (in this case, one who doesn’t have a great reputation for parenting his own offspring) will take good care of him and raise him up to know and follow God. "Shouldn’t somebody call Child Protection Services?"

This is no act of abandonment, however. This has nothing to do with an abdication of parental responsibility. It is, indeed, a courageous and faith-infused act—even though they could have hardly known the outcome and probably didn’t live to see many of the great things their son did as spiritual leader of an entire nation—that ends up altering the course of a nation, and contributing to the unfolding story of God’s saving work on earth for the redemption of his people.

Hannah and Elkanah Were Not Fools

In thinking the unthinkable and doing what, in the short run, must have seemed, by conventional wisdom’s standards, to be utterly foolish, they gained a settled peace of mind that, no doubt, baffled their neighbors. They trusted God for the gift of a child and, ultimately, with the outcome of that child’s life.

We have had to learn the hard way that the only thing we can really do for our children is to love them unconditionally and pray for them regularly. Both of our daughters like this approach much better than the lecturing, cajoling, and controlling strategies. Letting go is a freeing thing for all of us.

If they had thought of the words first, Hannah and Elkanah would have written them down in their diaries. Jim Elliot is famous for the line, however, having penned it in his own journal prior to his untimely death at the hand of the Huaorani (Auca) people of Ecuador, for which he and his four missionary companions made the ultimate sacrifice: "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose." This was indeed the mindset of Samuel’s parents. They just put it in other words and God rewarded their deep commitment.

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